Friday, January 25, 2008


The best way to keep your kids out of hot water is to put some dishes in it.

Children brighten up a home: They always forget to turn out the lights!

Your child has started growing up when he stops asking you where he came from and starts refusing to tell you where he's going.

Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.

A modest pat on the back develops character in children - if given young enough, often enough, and low enough.

Isn't it wonderful the way youngsters always brighten up the home? They never turn out the light!

Life's golden age is when the kids are too old to need baby-sitters and too young to borrow the family car.

Grandchildren are our reward for not strangling our children

In raising your children spend half as much money and twice as much time.

If a child annoys you, quiet him by brushing his hair. If this doesn't work, use the other side of the brush and the other end if the child.

Babies are such a nice way to start people.

Shouting at your children to get cooperation is about the same as steering your car using the horn... same results.

True genetics have nothing to do with hair and eye color. It's the occurrence of such things as "Who said life was FAIR?", and "Because I SAID so!" when you promised you'd never use those words on your kids.

When wings are grown, birds and children fly away.--Chinese Proverb

Under great oaks, only mushrooms grow.-- Russian proverb

It is no wonder that people are so horrible when they start their life as children.--Kingsley Amis

Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them. James Baldwin

Childhood is measured out by sounds and smells and sights, before the dark hour of reason grows. --John Betjeman _Summoned by Bells_

Children's children are a crown to the aged, and parents are the pride of their children. Prov. 17:6

Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it. Prov. 22:6

I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth. 3John 4

There are only two lasting bequests we can hope to give our children. One of these is roots ... the other, wings. --Henry Ward Beecher

I stopped believing in Santa Claus at age six when my mo ther took me to see him in a store and he asked for my autograph. -- Shirley Temple Black

If your baby is "beautiful and perfect, never cries or fusses, sleeps on schedule and burps on demand, an angel all the time," you're the grandma.
Theresa Bloomingdale

I have never understood, for example, how come a child can climb up on the roof, scale the TV antenna and rescue the cat--yet cannot walk down the hallway without grabbing both walls with his grubby hands for balance. Or how come a child can eat yellow snow, kiss the dog on the lips, chew gum that he found in the ashtray, put his mouth over a muddy garden house . . . and refuse to drink from a glass his brother has just used. ~ Erma Bombeck 1927-1996 , If Life is a Bowl of Cherries--What Am I Doing in the Pits? (1978)

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one" (Leo J.Burke)

There is no finer investment for any community than putting milk into babies.--- Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

There are three ways to get something done: do it yourself, employ someone to do it, or forbid your children from doing it. --Monta Crane

The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents, and the second half by our children. -- Clarence Darrow

Poverty is hereditary - you get it from your children" (Phyllis Diller)

Madam, there's no such thing as a tough child -- if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender. -- W. C. Fields

Your children need your presence more than your presents.--Jesse Jackson (1941- )

Kids today learn a lot about getting to the moon, but very little about getting to heaven. --David Jeremiah

You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance. -Franklin P. Jones

I looked on child rearing not only as a work of love and duty but as a profession that was fully as interesting and challenging as any honourable profession in the world and one that demanded the best I could bring to it.
Rose Kennedy (1890-1995) "Words of Women Quotations for Success," by Power Dynamics Publishing, 1997.

I tell myself that God gave my children many gifts -- spirit, beauty, intelligence, the capacity to make friends and to inspire respect. .. . There was only one gift he held back -- length of life.Rose Kennedy (1890-1995)

Babies:A loud noise at one end and no sense of responsibility at the other. Ronald Knox

Everyone who ever walked barefoot into his child's room late at night hates Legos. -- Tony Kornheiser

Any kid who has two parents who are interested in him and has a houseful of books isn't poor. -- Sam Levenson

The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy.--Sam Levenson (1911 - 1980)

Remember, your basic assignment as a parent is to work yourself out of a job. --Paul Lewis

Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he is buying.-Fran Lebowitz

There are many things you can learn from children, like how many patience you have for instance (Fran Lebowitz)

A child of five would understand this. Send somebody to fetch a child of five. --Groucho Marx

If I'd realised how much fun grandchildren were, I'd have had them first!-- Faith Myers

I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.--Robert Orben

Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them. --P.J. O'Rourke

When we are planning for posterity, we ought to remember that virtue is not hereditary. --Thomas Paine

If you treat children like grown-ups, they'll probably behave just as badly as the rest of us. Beryl Pfizer

One half of the children born die before their eighth year. This is nature's law; why try to contradict it?
Jean Jacques Rousseau, "mile, ou de l'education", 1762

There is nothynge that more dyspleaseth God,
Than from their children to spare the rod.
John Skelton. Circa 1460-1529. Magnyfycence. Line 1954.
...each new generation born is in effect an invasion of civilization by little barbarians, who must be civilized before it is too late. -- Thomas Sowell

Children are a wonderful gift . . . They have an extraordinary capacity to see into the heart of things and to expose sham and humbug for what they are.Desmond Tutu (1931-____)"The Words of Desmond Tutu," 1984.

Kids go where there is excitement. They stay where there is love. -- Zig Ziglar

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